Quick...start counting before I fall!

I should have posted about this when it happened since it's such a big deal! A few days ago - November 17th to be precise, after months of practice leading up to the big moment, Vir Gogoi finally stood up on his own two feet and stayed there without support from anyone or anything. And stayed there for a full 12 seconds. This, obviously, is no ordinary feat. He knows this more than anyone else, judging by the absolutely wonderful grin on his face when as he balances himself and Vijay and I start to count up how long he can balance. He has this expression of pride at his accomplishment and joy that he's causing us to be so excited, and thrill at being the center of attention (it doesn't get old, does it?), that I cannot describe (I've been trying to catch it in a picture, and will put one up when I manage). And when he falls, it's normally because he starts laughing too hard, or because he turns himself too quickly to make sure Vijay's still watching.

Of course, ever since he first stood up hesitantly, his confidence has grown drastically, as yours would too if you practiced the skill approximately 700 times a day. I'm glad he's giving it his all though, since his two little feet have a long way to go. Touch wood.

I called her on her cell phone...

...and she'll be right down with him. All is well.

We're all going to die..

...or so one would think from the panic in me right now. Mashui, the lady who looks after Vir while I work has taken him to meet a Mizo family who lives just upstairs. She's from Mizoram herself and goes upstairs once in a while to say hello to them. I guess they wanted to meet Vir. But though I told her it's okay, I have had all imaginable thoughts about what the big wide world where I have sent him without my attendance will do to him. The somewhat logical side of me says that Mashui has never been careless with him so far, and will be careful with him, and besides, she'll be back in 5 minutes as promised, and after all, I must learn to let go a little, and of course, he's getting to be quite a big boy now, and I'm literally 18 steps away from him if I take the staircase if something goes wrong, and no, they won't really smoke in front of him because I specifically told them they couldn't, just after I told her she couldn't take him into the balcony. Crap, I forgot to tell her she shouldn't give him anything to eat though. But she knows not to, right? And besides, this might actually be good for him...to start meeting other people and become a little more social, a little more used to other faces. But I don't really know them. And it's taken me at least 5 minutes to write this. Add that to the 3 minutes I spent standing on the balcony to try and hear what was going on upstairs and you have a solid 8 minutes that he has spent upstairs. I'm going to force myself to wait another 5 minutes before I sprint up and check. Just so I know he's okay. Of course, now we all know I'm a little crazy.

It's a Mom!

I'm deviating a little with this post, because I want to write about this really great book I'm reading called "It's a Mom!" by Shefali Tsabary. It's a really honest book and so far (I'm not even 1/4th of the way through) tells it like it is. Which, I can tell you, is not what your average book on motherhood does. There are tonnes of books (really good ones, many of them) which talk about what to expect with the pregnancy, birth, and baby, but they all focus on the baby and his/her developmental stages. This one focuses on the mother and her absolutely crazy range of thoughts and emotions from the time she finds out she's pregnant till pretty much forever after that. I'd definitely recommend you pick this one up if you're pregnant or a new first time mother. Be prepared for a tonne of reality though, which you will nod enthusiastically to if you're a new mother glad that, finally, someone undertands, but which might worry you a tad if you're on your way! I know I feel like someone is venting for me as I'm going through the pages! Someone who knows that even though we whine and vent, we wouldn't exchnage this situation for the whole world. Even if it was made of chocolate.

Random Thoughts

It's a bit sad that Vir had no voice in who his parents should be. He just showed up in my uterus one day and that pretty much determined his whole life - just like that. I'd like to think he'd have chosen Vijay and me out of a line-up if he did have a choice, but sometimes, I'm not completely sure. Like on days when I haven't spent much time with him and just given him cursory hugs in between trips from my computer to the bathroom and back. Or when I find myself getting impatient with him for clinging to me and not wanting me to walk away. Or when I try to force him to eat khichdi but strangely, don't let him chew on Baggdu's tail, which (don't I get it?) is so much better. And I know he can't understand me, but if he could, what would he say to my constant whining about not having watched a movie in almost a year, or not having slept on a full bed for a full night? It's not like he asked to be hungry in the middle of the night, or to have teeth cut out of his gums and make his life difficult.

On the other hand, perhaps he would pass off my strange behavior as "the way grown ups are" and pick me anyway. Because he'd see that noone can love him as I do. And while that doesn't make khichdi any yummier, it's got to count for something.

First Diwali

Vir's first Diwali was on the 9th of this month. We went to Dehradun to spend it with my parents - we always try to make sure we're together on Diwali. It's very predictable - my dad directing the installation of lights on the roof and boundary wall, my mom and I wrapping gifts for people, Vijay eating all the dry fruit out of the bowl on the dining table, and Powder barking at each and every cracker pre-, during-, and post-Diwali. The evening is always the same too - dad, Vijay, and I put candles on every blank surface outside the house while my mom makes the mandir pretty for the evening arti.

Things were a little different this time. For one, my mom had a tiny, 9 month-old helper in her mandir. He sat with her the entire time and busied himself taking out brass diyas from every corner he could crawl into and generally rearranging everything in the mandir. Mum didn't mind at all, but only because it was Vir. Heaven save anyone else who dares to touch anything at all in there. The arti was a little different too, since Vir noisily joined in in the not-very-professional-to-begin-with singing. The customary photo session also had him as the little addition in each and every picture.

All in all, I think he fit really well into the Gandhi family Diwali routine. I hope he grows to love and cherish the "same old" Diwali evenings as much as I do.

Sleep training

I'm desperately in search of a foolproof way to get Vir to sleep on time at night. That's right - I dream of a day when I'll say "Goodnight, Vir" and he'll close his eyes, smile a peaceful little smile and be off to sleep for the entire night, leaving me with some alone time...with Vijay, with the TV, with my computer, and (somebody stop me) maybe even a book!

One of the tricks I tried last night was to lie down in bed with him and pretend to be fast asleep. I thought he'd eventually get bored playing by himself and fall asleep too. I was wrong. At first I thought I was on the right track. He tried all sorts of things to wake me up and get a reaction from me, including hanging by the headboard, crawling on my back, eating the blanket, and nipping at my arm. Then, he got bored and crawled next to me and lay down in exactly the same position as me to see if it was really as much fun as I made it look. Clearly, he didn't think so. It was only a couple of minutes from there till he found my hair and tugged out a few strands. Brave as I may be, I squealed in pain and that was the end of my wonderful plan. He figured out what got him a reaction and went all out to get it. I guess I don't need to tell you how the next couple of hours passed. He's catching up on the lost sleep now. I'll catch up in my next life.

9 months!

I'm two days late on this one. I guess it's okay since he hasn't done anything new in the last two days! He just played till really late at night and didn't let us sleep when we wanted to. But we all know that's nothing new!

So here goes. Vir can now do the following amazing things:

• Smile a dazzling smile that's mostly gums and half of a tooth at people of his choosing. That's right - the razor edge from the 4th of October is now a little stubby half tooth.


• Crawl! I'm particularly proud of this one because he gets it right like he read it in a book. He doesn't go backwards like some babies do, he doesn't fall, he doesn't creep. He gets down there and he crawls like a champ. Vijay and I couldn't be prouder. (We're not the most ambitious as parents go.)


• Pull up to standing very easily and even cruise a couple of steps sometimes.


• Say aaja. Well, he only said it that one time, but he can say it. He's not doing it just to mess with me.


• Feed himself biscuits. He can pick up little pieces from his food tray and aim them towards his mouth. And chew and swallow them.


• Climb vertical surfaces. Obviously he is not successful at this and this exercise always ends in a loud thud. He's proving my baby book right - he has more brawn than brains. This means Vijay and I have more grey hair and less peace.

This 9 month update is special for me because he has now officially spent as much time out in the world as in my tummy. Somehow, that means something. Also, in the last 9 months, he has firmly established himself as the center of our world and we cannot imagine what we thought was our reason for living before he came along.